Today is my parents 61st wedding anniversary. Is still present tense if one of the partners is deceased? For my mother it is. My father passed away 11 years ago, this October 21st. I miss him. My mother misses him more. He was her partner for 50 years and 4 months when he died. Mom told me this morning she can hardly believe that 61 years ago today they got married. She said she hardly feels that old at all, but then she looks in the mirror, and yup, she's that old! She'll be 82 in September.
It got me thinking of the commitment, the ups and downs of a 50 year marriage. And my first thought was "WoW". I thought of some things I remember between them, first through my child's eyes, then a teen, a young adult, a married parent myself; still observing the two people who had brought me into this world.
I watched them grow, even as I grew. Sometimes growing very close together, sometimes more apart for a time, but always, even as their relationship evolved and changed through the years, always growing close again, being The Team.
As a child I saw were moments between them that I now know were "intimate" moments, a glance, a brief touch, a smile that didn't include us kids. Those moments made me feel safe and loved; I knew that love spilled over onto me. I could feel it. I felt it all my life.
Thank you Mom and Dad. July 3, 2009